Reset Password
If you've forgotten your password, you can enter your email address below. An email will then be sent with a link to set up a new password.
Cancel
Reset Link Sent
If the email is registered with our site, you will receive an email with instructions to reset your password. Password reset link sent to:
Check your email and enter the confirmation code:
Don't see the email?
  • Resend Confirmation Link
  • Start Over
Close
If you have any questions, please contact Customer Service
Hookup, Find Sex or Meet Someone Hot Now

Picture it....  

secret_lade 49F
14311 posts
6/18/2021 2:50 pm
Picture it....


The brother and I are seated in the small office of the funeral home....

Once again.

The management company for my father's apartment complex was kind enough allow us in retrieve my mother's cremated remains and search through his documents find the rumored life insurance documents that we'd heard about but never seen.

Miracle of miracles... One did exist.

So, there we sat.

Grandma Moses was seated across from us behind a desk, slowly combing through the policy with her coke-bottle glasses on the tip of her nose, policy about an inch from her face.

"You'll have pardon me, I'm legally blind."

Um... What?!?

I was missing the funeral director we'd been working with already. Ae we certain the blind woman is the best candidate to be going over policy information? At one point she had an assistant read aloud the policy number so she could write it down in large numbers on a sheet of paper....

Grandma Moses went to work calling the insurance company to find out the amount of the policy and who the beneficiary was, I sat there and thought about everything I had seen that morning.

Except for all the fans in the windows, the apartment looked just like any other lived-in apartment. A couple of dishes in the sink. A half eaten peanut butter and jelly sandwich on the counter, three dots of jelly on the counter next to it. A pair of socks were laying on the floor next to a recliner.... Like he'd sat down to relax and kicked off his socks.

Thankfully there was no evidence of where he had died and went unnoticed for fifteen days.

"Good news guys. The policy is active and there is enough to cover your father's burial costs. The policy holder is a [brother-in-law], we will have to make contact with him for his approval to appropriate funds."

Of all the things that had gone wrong so far, it was good to hear something go right. It was my father's Brother-In-Law who had initially alerted us to the fact that this policy did exist. The sister had originally been the beneficiary, but when she passed last year, it was transferred to her husband, Brother-In-Law.

My brother had given him a call right then and Brother-In-Law came right in to the funeral home. He was immediately emotional and broken up, tears in his eyes and his voice catching. He had thanked us for taking care of the arrangements even though we had originally believed we'd be covering the costs.

"Your dad didn't think you wanted anything to do with him, he just wanted to be taken care of when he passed."

"He's our dad. Regardless of anything that may have happened over the years, he's still our dad. There is no way we would not take care of him."

This got the Brother-In-Law crying, I could almost see a weight being lifted from his shoulders.

We had Grandma Moses go over the financials once again....

In total, the burial, the barn wood casket, and the headstone would be roughly $8000 and the policy would cover all of it. Brother-In-Law signed the final document allowing the funeral home to handle the monies and everything was said and done.

What was once a living, breathing human being is now gone, and all I can think of... Picture in my mind.... Is that half eaten peanut butter and jelly sandwich sitting on the counter.

Waiting for my father to finish eating it.

CL_Love 51M/50F
425 posts
6/23/2021 1:31 pm

Funny - my dad had diabetes and ate pb on bread (not usually jelly) every night before he went to bed to be sure his sugar wouldn't drop too much over night. My stepmom incessantly bitched at him for leaving the knife on the counter. Eleven years he's been gone and anytime one of my family members leaves a pb knife sitting out I choke up a bit. Funny the things we notice. Funny the things we remember. ((HUGS))


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
6/19/2021 10:26 pm

    Quoting citizen4722:
    Funerals are so expensive, that's why I pay into a plan every month.
    Peace of mind more than anything.
I have a life insurance policy too... but I've learned a lot from all this. At the very least, make sure the beneficiaries have copies of the policy. They will need that policy number and it will be much easier on them to not have to search through your stuff to find it.


citizen4722 66M  
74582 posts
6/19/2021 1:09 pm

Funerals are so expensive, that's why I pay into a plan every month.
Peace of mind more than anything.


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
6/19/2021 4:45 am

    Quoting mc_justmc:
    That's sad. A life interrupted. It was thoughtful of him to arrange to cover his funeral expenses. His Mother was cremated and he had the remains, which makes me wonder, was there a reason y'all chose a burial instead of cremation?
My dad was raised old school Catholic, went to Catholic school. You could not be buried in a Catholic cemetery if you were not whole and intact, cremation was banned. He wanted to be buried by his parents, who reside in a Catholic cemetery.

It was my mom who was cremated, not his mom.


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
6/19/2021 3:47 am

    Quoting boobwhisperer69:
    Its the strangest memories that stick to us and make each of us human, no matter the good or bad!!!! Sorry for your loss!! The process will take a while! Hugs


mc_justmc 63M

6/19/2021 2:45 am

That's sad. A life interrupted. It was thoughtful of him to arrange to cover his funeral expenses. His Mother was cremated and he had the remains, which makes me wonder, was there a reason y'all chose a burial instead of cremation?


boobwhisperer69 61M  
8322 posts
6/18/2021 9:51 pm

Its the strangest memories that stick to us and make each of us human, no matter the good or bad!!!! Sorry for your loss!! The process will take a while! Hugs


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
6/18/2021 8:18 pm

    Quoting lickeyzsplit:
    Funny how the last things that they were doing get stuck in your mind ! your Dad's half eaten PBJ sandwich ....... My wife passed last year she put her full cup of coffee down B4 her heart attack ...... now i see coffee i think of her last morning Her word find open to a certain page and held there from her pen ... Like I say it happened over a year ago but some silly little things just stay with us ...
I'm not sure what I was expecting to find, but it was pretty difficult seeing everything look so normal, like the occupant would be home at any moment. Very surreal.


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
6/18/2021 8:06 pm

    Quoting nsnguystill:
    the strangest thoughts sneak into our minds at the strangest times...
    my condolences to you all.
They certainly do, dont they.


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
6/18/2021 8:05 pm

    Quoting pagancountrygirl:
    I'm hoping Grandma Moses doesn't drive herself to work.
    It sounds like things finally went a bit in your favor today. It will get better.
True story, she only wears those glasses when she reads. The rest of the time, no glasses. When she greeted us at the door we talked for like 20 minutes, would have never guessed a thing.


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
6/18/2021 8:02 pm

    Quoting mufdiver69er2:
    pb&j...my fave...hang in miss..the ride aint over yet..
Once he's in the ground, this part of the ride is over for me. The managing company for those apartments is telling us we have to take them to probate court to get his belongings. I told them it wasn't going to happen. They asked who was going to clean out his apartment? I told them they could take us to probate court. They didn't think I was funny.


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
6/18/2021 7:53 pm

    Quoting Paulxx001:
    Fifteen days? OMG...
    That's, MY worst nightmare.
    There's a lot going on there — hang on. 🌹❗
Here's something worse... it was a senior assisted living facility. A neighbor had brought it to the attention of the manager 3 times that he hadn't been seen in several days. It finally took a phone call from that neighbor to the police for him to be discovered. Shameful.


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
6/18/2021 7:49 pm

    Quoting hippiechick1967:
    I buried my mother 2 months ago. I made peace with her before she died but we were awkward and distant. I feel like I'm not mourning her death; rather I'm mourning the relationship I could have had with a mother who loved me.
I know this feeling well.


hippiechick1967 60F  
13154 posts
6/18/2021 7:13 pm

I buried my mother 2 months ago. I made peace with her before she died but we were awkward and distant. I feel like I'm not mourning her death; rather I'm mourning the relationship I could have had with a mother who loved me.

Elevate me...


LadiesR2B1rst 60M  
2735 posts
6/18/2021 6:13 pm

Thanks for sharing.


Paulxx001 67M
22642 posts
6/18/2021 6:08 pm

Fifteen days? OMG...
That's, MY worst nightmare.
There's a lot going on there — hang on. 🌹❗


mufdiver69er2 63M  
1953 posts
6/18/2021 5:06 pm

pb&j...my fave...hang in miss..the ride aint over yet..

woop woop


pagancountrygirl 66F
6466 posts
6/18/2021 4:46 pm

I'm hoping Grandma Moses doesn't drive herself to work.
It sounds like things finally went a bit in your favor today. It will get better.

Pagan
Hmmmm....I know I left that wand around here somewhere!


nsnguystill 71M
428 posts
6/18/2021 4:03 pm

the strangest thoughts sneak into our minds at the strangest times...
my condolences to you all.

there is a world of difference between insane and stupid


lickeyzsplit 61M
1516 posts
6/18/2021 3:49 pm

Funny how the last things that they were doing get stuck in your mind ! your Dad's half eaten PBJ sandwich ....... My wife passed last year she put her full cup of coffee down B4 her heart attack ...... now i see coffee i think of her last morning Her word find open to a certain page and held there from her pen ... Like I say it happened over a year ago but some silly little things just stay with us ...


secret_lade 49F
9227 posts
6/18/2021 2:51 pm

The brother and I are seated in the small office of the funeral home....

Once again.

The management company for my father's apartment complex was kind enough to allow us in to retrieve my mother's cremated remains and search through his documents to find the rumored life insurance documents that we'd heard about but never seen.

Miracle of miracles... One did exist.

So, there we sat.

Grandma Moses was seated across from us behind a desk, slowly combing through the policy with her coke-bottle glasses on the tip of her nose, policy about an inch from her face.

"You'll have to pardon me, I'm legally blind."

Um... What?!?

I was missing the funeral director we'd been working with already. Ae we certain the blind woman is the best candidate to be going over policy information? At one point she had an assistant read aloud the policy number so she could write it down in large numbers on a sheet of paper....

Grandma Moses went to work calling the insurance company to find out the amount of the policy and who the beneficiary was, I sat there and thought about everything I had seen that morning.

Except for all the fans in the windows, the apartment looked just like any other lived-in apartment. A couple of dishes in the sink. A half eaten peanut butter and jelly sandwich on the counter, three dots of jelly on the counter next to it. A pair of socks were laying on the floor next to a recliner.... Like he'd sat down to relax and kicked off his socks.

Thankfully there was no evidence of where he had died and went unnoticed for fifteen days.

"Good news guys. The policy is active and there is enough to cover your father's burial costs. The policy holder is a [brother-in-law], we will have to make contact with him for his approval to appropriate funds."

Of all the things that had gone wrong so far, it was good to hear something go right. It was my father's Brother-In-Law who had initially alerted us to the fact that this policy did exist. The sister had originally been the beneficiary, but when she passed last year, it was transferred to her husband, Brother-In-Law.

My brother had given him a call right then and Brother-In-Law came right in to the funeral home. He was immediately emotional and broken up, tears in his eyes and his voice catching. He had thanked us for taking care of the arrangements even though we had originally believed we'd be covering the costs.

"Your dad didn't think you wanted anything to do with him, he just wanted to be taken care of when he passed."

"He's our dad. Regardless of anything that may have happened over the years, he's still our dad. There is no way we would not take care of him."

This got the Brother-In-Law crying, I could almost see a weight being lifted from his shoulders.

We had Grandma Moses go over the financials once again....

In total, the burial, the barn wood casket, and the headstone would be roughly $8000 and the policy would cover all of it. Brother-In-Law signed the final document allowing the funeral home to handle the monies and everything was said and done.

What was once a living, breathing human being is now gone, and all I can think of... Picture in my mind.... Is that half eaten peanut butter and jelly sandwich sitting on the counter.

Waiting for my dad to finish eating it.


Become a member to create a blog